meet kai: she's 21 but feels like she's still 17...she has friends but can't seem to find them...she loves "him" and is sure "he" loves her too...she is good today, but who knows about tomorrow?..in her past life she was bad...very bad she lies...she plays games...she hurts people...but most of the time she hurts herself...she can't feel sorry for others or for herself...she is immune to shame...and pain...and once, even love...she is angry...she wants everything she thinks she deserves (even if she doesn't really) and - sometimes - more...she wants people, but not friends...she wants them to see her...but not necessarily like her...she wants them to hold her...but not touch her...she wants them to like her...but not...love...her...she is lonely...but not lonesome, no...she has everything she can possibly need...but she "needs" everything she wants...she is selfish...full of malcontent...full of mischief and trickery...not for fun...but for pain...she is kai...she was kai... but this was before...she has changed...surely, kai has changed...ryt kai?...kai?... >maybe...maybe not...we'll see, we'll see... please change...oh but she has...now kai is sweet...she is loved and loving...she cares...she doesn't want to hurt people...or to get hurt either...but...she still plays games...foolish games...maybe she is confused...she just needs time...give her time...she will change...she shall change...for "him"...and maybe...for herself...give her time...you will meet kai...the real kai... p.s >kai loves you...you know who you are...you who are always beside kai...who takes her side all of the time...and sometimes (mischevious grin) even when kai is wrong...very wrong...but you still love her...and take care of her...and most of all...feed her :-)...you make kai very happy...yes, you do...kai may be broken for now...but for you...she will be whole again...and one day...she will be yours...really yours...but surely you know that :-)...sure you do...kai loves you ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ listen real close... can you hear me sing? if you can hear the voices around you or the music that exists or the rumble of technology or the screams of your neighbor then you can never hear me sing for i am the whispers of palm trees in the wind i am the the soft mews of a newborn kitten i am the moans of an angry weeping heart i am the dead poets' songs never written i am a childless mother's grief i am the lover who waits in vain i am the orphan in the street i am the homeless standing in the rain now listen once more can you hear me sing? clean not the dirt in your ears but those that clog your heart then only will you hear the songs that have been always there from the start ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~